It's all about confidence. The content is not intended to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Living the dream! Ive had worse. If you are in a coma, on the other hand, you are legally very much alive. [Read: The step-by-step guide to being a funny person and make everyone love your company]. Could be payday. No one loves superheroes. Im too fine for the ugly, yet too ugly for the fine. Thinking of you not existing makes me want to masturbate. 35 Best Texts to Respond to a Date that has Ghosted You If corporate email language won't do it, nothing will. The only way youll ever get laid is if you crawl up a chickens butt and wait. 20 Hilarious Things Actually Said in Court Best Life Maybe they like you so much that it triggered some kind of reaction that ended their life. 900+ MAXINE CARTOONS ideas | maxine, bones funny, funny quotes - Pinterest My lawyer told me not to answer that question. The friendly ghost would never leave you hanging. I favour the "How am I what?" All you have to do is save this page, or commit to memory some of our favorite insults from the following list, and youll be all set. Voice command: Alexa, define rock paper scissors lizard Spock. Is everything stable at your end? Want to equip yourself with more responses? Privacy Policy. Thats because theres no vacancy in my heart. Brian OldWolf (author) from Troon on January 20, 2020: Shing Araya from Philippines on January 08, 2020: All are witty and funny at the same time. 1. 4. The answer to this question has become so generic it feels like there is an auto-complete machine in our heads! You grow on peoplebut then again, so does cancer. On this page, I've gathered together 100 of the best. Id hug and kiss you if you were single, just like me. Living a life of suppressed rage, emotional imbalance, and denial. I get my daily paper, look at the obituaries page and if Im not there, I carry on as usual. Patrick Moore (astronomer), He is one of those people who would be enormously improved by death. HH Munro (author), My father was from Aberdeen, and a more generous man you couldnt wish to meet. In My Phone or On My Phone Which is Correct? Of course, you don't want to brag, which is why this funny line is useful. Are you still alive? Follow for more funny content!! #fyp #bask 1. This is the perfect time for you to become a missing person. Just standing here waiting for stupid questions I guess. While most of us answer with an uninspired I am fine, thank you, the universal greeting question how are you? . I am doing wellor that could be my anti-depressants speaking. Mark Twain (author), "I like sleeping; it's like death without the commitment." Sure, we all have things to do, but when someone takes two days to reply, that is a sign that they are the problem. 81. (Explained). Depends who you ask, if you ask me, it was fine. 17. If you are not happy being single, then you will never be happy being in a relationship. Funny and Clever Quotes About Mortality, Death, and Dying Are you alive? - Random Answers - Fanpop Are you flirting with me right now? Theyre incapacitated when it comes to sending a simple text, yet they can Insta their whole day. HubPages is a registered trademark of The Arena Platform, Inc. Other product and company names shown may be trademarks of their respective owners. Because apparently, you need to go outside and talk to people to date. Are you going to marry me? Best 45 seconds of my life. 11. Thats no excuse for treating someone like they dont exist, especially since 85% of participants said theyd rather be told upfront that someones not feeling it. I wrote him a cheque for it, post-dated of course. Chic Murray (comedian), When I die, I hope to go to heaven, whatever the hell that is. Ayn Rand (author), The only difference between death and taxes is that death doesnt get worse every time congress meets. Will Rogers (actor), "My grandmother was a very tough woman. Ah, sarcasm. I have found that people in a coma find it very difficult to hold a phone, turn it on, look at their messages, think of a reply, and then type out their reply. The truth is, if you really want to get him back, you should follow the steps outlined here.. A A A Remember the time when you hated your ex too much that you wanted him dead? I think it's a great response when you're possibly feeling cranky. Use the opportunity to make a good impression. 3. Siri, why am I still single? I'm sorry I hurt your feelings when I called you stupid. With a self-assured stance and casual body language, you won't create any . I dont think youre an idiot but whats my opinion compared to countless others? I dont know how you do it, but after a shower, you look even greasier. Come on, now I want you to whisper that question slowly to my ear. Are those space pants? When someone really finds you funny over text, they may send laughing emoji or 'haha'. a fate worse than death." Youre not going to use the same response to your dad as you would your best friend, right? Someone took their costume way too seriously. Humans are very complex creatures, but we're also creatures of habit who say one thing when we mean another. The only way you'll ever get laid is if you crawl up a chicken's butt and wait. Use sarcasm to let them know that you do not approve. Im in a relationship with myself. "Yeah, you're three years late. You can put your foot in your mouth and your head up your ass at the same time! No one will expect to hear it, so you'll be catching your friends off guard. But half the time, it is a nightmare. I'm so sorry I expected you to acknowledge my existence after hanging out? They really care for you, and you better value their presence well. 38. Why would he text me "Are you still alive?"? - GirlsAskGuys The 'Sex And The City' Cab Light Theory, Revisited, It's Hot When People Call You By Your Last Name, I Never Feel Older Than When I Try To Make A TikTok, Get Even More From Bustle Sign Up For The Newsletter. Why some QAnon believers think JFK Jr is still alive - and about to 64. 60. 95. Great, but I should warn you that I am totally biased. No, waitIm actually plural. Shooting yourself in front of the person who asked. Steven Wright (comedian). Which just make the unexpected moments of levity all the more hilarious. All rights reserved. 20. You dont need to say it. If someone takes a long time to reply, it can feel much longer than it is. Because a single-storey is much more economical than a double-storey. Youre not really expecting them to write you an essay. Reply. Use them as you see fit when someone pokes their nose on your relationship status. 98. Because it sounds like some kind of automated message. If I was any better, vitamins would be taking me. You can fire back with a witty and flirty response. When you look at what some people have done for each other and compare it to what you expect. If someone clearly doesnt want to talk to you, the best thing to do is not talk to them. 50. 82. For your information, Im in a relationship with food. but it's just so blunt and funny. It depends on what or who I compare myself to. Is that a scar on your face? 48 smart and sarcastic lines and quotes that kick ass! And trust us, once you use these lines, everyone will be ooh-ing to your snarky comments the next time someone dares to make fun of you! 56. My standards are higher than what Ive seen lately. . Socioeconomically? How to Respond to An Insult With Humor? 41+ Best Comebacks If you are in a coma, then that is a valid excuse for not texting back. 18. As a result, they were so fixated on thinking about you, they forgot to reply to you. What Can Be the Worst Epic Responses To I Love You? - Bonobology.com You may join me, though. 39. 88. Its a before picture in one of those plastic surgery magazines, isnt it? Id love to see things from your perspective, but its almost impossible to get my head up your ass that far. Norman Wisdom (comedian), "I have lost friends, some by death, others through their sheer inability to cross the street." 86 Funny and Flirty Responses To 'How Are You Doing?' - Monk at 25 2. Are you going to help me have a good day? I always root for the little guy. Holy s**t, you can see me?! 83. [Read: How to be funny and make someone laugh over text just by being YOU]. Herodotus (historian), "At my age, I do what Mark Twain did. 22. I'm not saying I hate you, what I'm saying is that you are literally the Monday of my life. Alive Jokes. We found the best coronavirus memes about social distancing, toilet paper, homeschooling, as well as ways to spread a little more kindness. Its going great, really! It lets him know that you love spending time together. 14. For some reason, some people think that not texting back is cool. Spiritually? There's no reason why you should have to express emotions to whoever asked. While I'd love to give you the technique behind his funny comeback I can't. He may simply be one of the quickest minds in the West. I just woke up like that one day. 101. Hope this status quo persists for the rest of the day.". 4. No, they're prison pants. But, as soon as we feel better, that person no longer serves their purpose. But it can be funny. 3 I'm Just Wondering How You Are You are about as interesting as a documentary on dirt. Because they are already taking their time. Share the best GIFs now >>> My bad, its just your mouth. Why Give a Funny Response to an Everyday Question? Or, "Happy and content, thanks for asking. Get the very best of LovePanky straight to your inbox! If ugliness was measured in bricks, I would be the Great Wall of China. Because nowadays, the industry prefers singles over albums. In such a case, if you are unavailable to communicate with new clients right away, you can use auto responses instead. Turning the question around on them without actually having to answer? Stupidity isnt a crime. The best I can be. 9. April 6, 2018 There's nothing funny about being in a courtroom. #maudit # peter o'toole # happy birthdayyy # im glad youre still alive. Looking at my life, half the time I see that I don't live half of what I should! 5. And maybe thats the reason why theyre taking so long to reply. 2023 LovePanky.com Privacy Policy | Terms of Service | About Us | Write for Us | Contact Us, How to be funny and make someone laugh over text just by being YOU, How to learn to be witty and win over everyone in the room, 20 wise medieval insults you could bring back into trend, 12 types of humor you can use and how it affects the people around you, How to be funny and make people love your company, 30 foolproof pickup lines and 10 you should never ever use, How to have playful banter and keep the flirting alive forever, 20 things you MUST know to master a dry sense of humor, The step-by-step guide to being a funny person and make everyone love your company.
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